While parents are generally quite comfortable about talking about the problems digital devices pose in their homes, they are often hesitant to share their screen time rules. In fact, I was once such a parent. Worried that people would judge me by my rules, I would favor keeping my mouth shut.
It makes perfect sense that we parents have insecurities about sharing our rules; divulging to others what we are doing, or trying to do, often wakes up our inner critic—like it did to me. The critic says things like “I bet she is thinking I am a control freak,” or, “I am sure he thinks I am such a loser because I don’t have any rules around _____ (fill in the blank).”
But what I have learned is how incredibly helpful it is—for the sake of our children and teens—that we speak up and share the solutions we are trying. There are no chapters in What to Expect When You're Expecting on how to parent during a technology revolution. We need each other.
So now it’s time to ask your inner critic to go on vacation and challenge yourself to be more open with others about the rules you are trying in your home this summer. I am so grateful to the people below who shared their summertime rules with us at Screenagers over the past few weeks.
Let me first start with what rules are in place this summer for Tessa, our 16-year-old daughter. She came up with these last week as she just got home from camp after being unplugged for a couple of weeks. She started the conversation by sharing some goals she had for the rest of summer. Then, she said her plans/rules are to watch no more than 4 hours a week of TV-type shows and spend just an hour a day on social media. (We also have other family rules about tech that you can see in an earlier post). In an upcoming TTT, I will cover how she will be accountable for those goals because the topic of enforcing limits deserves a full blog post.
Here are other people’s rules for the summer:
For this week’s TTT, here are some conversation starters:
As well as our weekly blog, we publish videos like this one every week on the Screenagers YouTube channel
While parents are generally quite comfortable about talking about the problems digital devices pose in their homes, they are often hesitant to share their screen time rules. In fact, I was once such a parent. Worried that people would judge me by my rules, I would favor keeping my mouth shut.
It makes perfect sense that we parents have insecurities about sharing our rules; divulging to others what we are doing, or trying to do, often wakes up our inner critic—like it did to me. The critic says things like “I bet she is thinking I am a control freak,” or, “I am sure he thinks I am such a loser because I don’t have any rules around _____ (fill in the blank).”
But what I have learned is how incredibly helpful it is—for the sake of our children and teens—that we speak up and share the solutions we are trying. There are no chapters in What to Expect When You're Expecting on how to parent during a technology revolution. We need each other.
So now it’s time to ask your inner critic to go on vacation and challenge yourself to be more open with others about the rules you are trying in your home this summer. I am so grateful to the people below who shared their summertime rules with us at Screenagers over the past few weeks.
Let me first start with what rules are in place this summer for Tessa, our 16-year-old daughter. She came up with these last week as she just got home from camp after being unplugged for a couple of weeks. She started the conversation by sharing some goals she had for the rest of summer. Then, she said her plans/rules are to watch no more than 4 hours a week of TV-type shows and spend just an hour a day on social media. (We also have other family rules about tech that you can see in an earlier post). In an upcoming TTT, I will cover how she will be accountable for those goals because the topic of enforcing limits deserves a full blog post.
Here are other people’s rules for the summer:
For this week’s TTT, here are some conversation starters:
As well as our weekly blog, we publish videos like this one every week on the Screenagers YouTube channel
Are you co-parenting kids? Do you find that one of you focuses more on establishing rules about screen time while the other is less concerned? You don’t need me to tell you that answering yes to that question is incredibly common, and it can be a major stressor in homes. I look at the challenge and seek solutions in today's blog.
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One phrase I’ve often used over the years is “fighting fire with fire,” and when it comes to managing screen time, this idea can really come in handy. Incorporating parental controls into your family’s screen time routine can make things run more smoothly at home. And summer is an ideal time to consider this approach.
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A topic I hear from parents regularly is regret—regret about saying yes to a tech device too soon. Maybe it was a smartphone, a smartwatch, a gaming console in the bedroom, or allowing social media. Today’s post is about how to reverse course on a tech decision for your child thoughtfully — and possibly prevent even deeper regret down the road.
READ MORE >for more like this, DR. DELANEY RUSTON'S NEW BOOK, PARENTING IN THE SCREEN AGE, IS THE DEFINITIVE GUIDE FOR TODAY’S PARENTS. WITH INSIGHTS ON SCREEN TIME FROM RESEARCHERS, INPUT FROM KIDS & TEENS, THIS BOOK IS PACKED WITH SOLUTIONS FOR HOW TO START AND SUSTAIN PRODUCTIVE FAMILY TALKS ABOUT TECHNOLOGY AND IT’S IMPACT ON OUR MENTAL WELLBEING.
